Day 311 - Balance, Balance, Balance, Balance

Balance. Balance. Balance. Balance. How do I keep it all together and keep my needs in line with what other people in my life need? It doesn't matter how many times I am faced with a personal challenge, it's as if I have to figure out the balance thing all over  again. There are certain things that go into the formula - eat well, sleep well, rest, take my meds, manage the stress, talk things through, don't hold feelings inside and make sure I have enough physical energy to do whatever is on my list. I have to know when to say no and I have to be clear within myself to know what I want to say yes to and what has to go by the wayside so that my sense of balance stays intact.

 

I know what I need to stay on an even keel and I know what puts me over the edge. I know what my emotional boundaries are and I know when I am running out of physical energy and it is time to stop doing whatever I am doing. I also know when I am running on borrowed energy and I have to pay attention to my body when it speaks to me. I have spent a big part of my life living beyond my energy means. When I was in my thirties and forties I was traveling with work, raising kids (part of that time as a single parent) and literally burning the candles at both ends. I was into Yoga, positive thinking, stress management and I was physically active. Even so, I was stressed beyond what my body could manage and I started experiencing all kinds of stress-related symptoms. I tried to achieve balance, but it was elusive. I paid a high price for being out of balance.

 

I am in a place now where it feels like I am taking good care of myself and I don't want to put that at risk. But life isn't always as simple as saying I don't want to rock the boat just because I am in a good place. Stuff happens and there are times when we have to consider what others need and at the same time make sure we continue to take care of ourselves. Balance. I need to achieve it. I need to keep it and I need to make sure that I pay attention to what I need and what my loved ones need. What good is family if we can;t be there for each other. Love is a verb and I am an action person. I have some thinking to do and I am going to do well with this balancing act. I will do what I have to do and will be mindful as I am doing it.