This afternoon my hubby called from work and asked if I would help him with dropping his car off to be serviced. No problem. It was the only thing I planned to do outside the house today so it didn't seem like a big deal. Plus, it's the least I can do since he did the grocery shopping on his way home from work. But here it is at the end of the day and I don't feel like going anywhere. I am done. Drained. Kaput. Seems that life has a way of sneaking up on me, even when I have other plans. I thought I'd be fine to do a short drive to pick my hubby up from the service station. This is just another example of saying yes to something and then I find I've run out of energy.
Since I have been home it's been pretty easy to determine my own schedule and avoid over-doing it. But sometimes I find myself over-doing it even though I thought I had things well laid out. Life sometimes decides to add a few more things to my day that I hadn't even considered doing. The week is really catching up with me, Between my lack of sleep, my continuing jet lag and some work and family matters that needed my attention, I am running on empty. I got to sleep by one this morning, so that was at least a little better than the night before. I am aiming for another hour sooner tonight. It is clear that I am still not up to a full schedule.
This week was busy, but it wasn't even close to my regular schedule. I never left the house today and I took a good nap this afternoon when it was clear that I was nodding off. I got into bed, pulled up the covers and slept soundly for about an hour. I must be feeling stressed because my neck and upper back are screaming at me. It doesn't take much to get me off track and I can immediately feel it in my body and in my fatigue level. It's the end of the day and I have to get myself together to drive across town. It seems like such a small thing, but I'm beat. As I'm writing this I see that my hubby has drifted off to sleep while he was watching television. I guess I'm not the only one who feels wiped out. I guess I should wake him up so we can get going. Thank goodness tomorrow is another slow day. I need it.
It is so very nice to see that someone with FM-ME can speak truly about how it is with this illness. I find that so many times, if I even garner to say how I am truly feeling, I get accused of being "negative". So, then I get scared to say how I am and then when I am asked that question, I who am usually a very social person, find myself fake smiling, nodding my head up and down, shrugging my shoulders and doing an "eh" kind of a response and then I feel stupid and mad at myself. However, I know what caused that. It was the hurtful, non understanding comments of others who caused me to go inward.
ReplyDeleteI love the title of your blog. I have something I've been working on for a long time that I cannot seem to get support for.,
We ALL need to stick together.
Thanks for posting. It isn't easy to stay real about something that isn't very pleasant. I work on keeping a positive attitude, but as you well know, it isn't easy. Hang in there and just do the best you can. And you're right - sticking together helps a lot!
ReplyDeleteTotally agree with you. It's hard to go more than one or two places a day. I have to tell people no if they need me between 2pm and 7pm. That's when I have to rest.
ReplyDelete