Day 292 - It's Not All Sunshine and Roses

There is no doubt that living with stress can play havoc with your emotions. Living with a chronic condition or a long-term challenge can knock the wind out of the most optimistic and pro-active person. Our bodies were not built to maintain a high stress level. We were built for the occasional bout with a tiger or other immediate and potentially calamitous threat. But in today's world, our bodies are constantly bombarded with one stressor or another - noise, work pressure, pollution, poor quality food, traffic, immediate and 24/7 local, national and world bad news. It is no wonder that when you plop a special challenge in someone's life it is going to wreak havoc with how they are feeling.  If I am stressed and not feeling well, I have to respect that and deal with it. There is no one that can do it for me. All of us - healthy, happy, sick or not,  experience a range of emotions. It's just who we are.

 

The relentless stress and the havoc it wreaks in our bodies and our emotions is the bad news, the good news is that every stress induced emotion has a need attached to it and when the need is met, the negative emotion subsides. If I am feeling all stressed out and anxious about what is, or isn't happening, in my life I can take steps to minimize my stress and the anxiety will subside. If I stay in the moment and focus on what I can do and what I am doing, those future worry thoughts, as well as my thoughts that focus on rehashing the past, fade to the background rather than taking center stage and making me more miserable. If I am feeling over whelmed it is a sign that something has to come off my plate. Things have probably gotten beyond me and my job is to quickly prioritize what's in front of me and let go of what I can, by either putting it off for another time, asking for help, or breaking the task down into manageable pieces. Usually if I am grumpy and moody it's because I am feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or stressed-out.

 

There are feelings of loss that come up when it seems that things aren't getting better, or worse yet, when they are getting worse. It is without question that lifestyle changes have to be made and things that once gave life pleasure and meaning have to be eliminated or adjusted. In those instances, it is time to do a rendezvous with reality and search my soul for the words to express my feelings, my longings and my grief. I can write, create, talk things through, have a good cry or find a place to share my experience and feel a sense of connection and camaraderie. The thing that will keep me stuck in sadness is not expressing how I am feeling and giving a voice to my concerns. Shutting down my emotions can only lead to anger or depression. Depression and anger occur when we don't think there is a chance for our needs to be met. So it is up to me to express what I want, what I don't want, and also what I need, so that there is a better chance for those needs to be addressed. If I deal with things before they get too big, anger and resentment won't grow to a degree that it becomes hurtful. That way I can remain on an even keel and at the same time respect that not every emotion I experience with be all sunshine and flowers, and I am just fine with that.