My Dad and I once took a trip together to Ireland and he was a little unsettled with our lack of a schedule for each day. We had a plan for a greneral direction, but nothing more than that to guide our travels. I figured we would take each day as it came and that worked out really well for us. By about the third unstructured day he was comfortable not knowing where the day might take us and even got into some possibility thinking. Life unfolds and I have always been pretty good at rolling with the punches. I'm great in a crisis - I step up, do what needs to be done, then collapse later. I can busy myself with whatever is around me and I like to think that I can bloom wherever I'm planted. When life delivers the unexpected, I can usually take it in stride. I like the idea of letting things happen as they may.
As comfortable as I am with going with the flow and being flexible, the unpredictability of my health is another story. I'm about done with not knowing what kind of day I'm going to have or having my energy shift in the middle of something I want to do and then having to leave it behind. I don't appreciate making plans and then having to change them because I've developed some annoying aspect of fibro or fatigue. I don't like not knowing that I can guarantee that I will have the energy and focus to make it through a day. I want to be able to go with the flow and not get stopped in my tracks. Since I know that there is a new element of unpredictablity in my days because of my health, I've started mapping out the essentials of my week. That way I make sure I balance the tough stuff with things that are less taxing. That helps me to feel more sure that essential tasks will get completed.
The past few days have been really good and then last night I had a hard time going to sleep. That set the stage for a crummy day today. I got up and was able to get to a morning appointment, but then I came home and hit the couch. Two hours later I woke up from my nap feeling groggy and grumpy with the start of a migraine. I ate some lunch and rested a bit more. It helped. Then I got outside for a walk and my much needed exercise. I lasted about forty minutes at a moderate pace and then I pooped out. It felt good to be outside and active. Once I got tired I immediately took care of myself. I stopped, I drank some water and rested a bit before I continued on with my day. It's early evening and it still feels like not so great a day. I'm tired and weary, but not sleepy. I can't predict tomorrow and that annoys me. Today wasn't what I wanted it to be, but I'll take tomorrow as it comes, and make it the best it can be.
No comments:
Post a Comment