There is something wonderful about being able to participate in the joys of summer. This past week has been a mixture of good days and bad, but enough of the good ones to allow me to have a great time. I am almost to the point that I would rather just have an all out bad day after a few good days of full functioning, than a bunch of days where I am half in and half out of my day. Even on my good days I continue to try to pace myself so I can sustain my energy through whatever I'm doing, but I do know that if I play, I will pay. Seems there is no way around that, Each day in the midst of my holiday weekend celebration I have been aware of how I am feeling and doing little things that others may not notice to keep me feeling okay. I do frequent breaks and change my activity from busy to calm and back again. I am religious about taking my meds and I am getting at least eight hours sleep each night.
My kind of fun doesn't take an enormous amount of energy anyway, so I can have a pretty good time at my own pace. I don't jog or go to the gym, but I find that I can burn up a good amount of emotional energy. When it comes to being with the kids I have a hard time holding back and they have the energy of a small army. Even with them, I find I can play for a while, but then I have to shift gears and collect myself. We all went on an outing to the water park. Instead of even attempting to walk through the park to watch them play, I opted to go into town and visit a shop or two and then sit by the lake sipping a cup of coffee and watching the boats go by. When they stopped for ice cream I opted out on that too because I knew the crash after a jolt of sugar wouldn't be good way to spend the late afternoon.
Everything I do takes energy so when I am at the cabin I am willing to let some things go to make room for others. My hubby is great about cleaning up the kitchen after meals and he isn't shy about getting himself something to eat if I am napping and the kids were great about sharing meal prep, too. The dog loves to walk in the woods so my hubby takes care him and I get to relax and have my fun while they do their hiking thing. We have things pretty well worked out and my hubby knows that if I spend my time dusting and cleaning and preparing all of the meals, I won't have any energy left for the good stuff, so we stick to more casual housekeeping. Even with my effort to pace myself, today wasn't much of a day. The weather was perfect, but I just felt crummy and so instead of being outside I read and napped. I did get down to the dock for a little while to throw a stick in the water for the dog to retrieve, but that's about it. Tomorrow will be a push to get packed up, get the house straightened out and do the drive back home. But every minute has been worth it. Time with family is precious and there isn't a better way for me to spend my energy.
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