Day 215 - Fibro and the Flying Monkeys

Some days I feel like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz. I remember that in the story Dorothy woke up after a tornado and found herself in a new and strange land and couldn't quite figure out how to get home again. She met a series of characters that turned out to be reflections of her own self. She found out that she needed to use her head and heart and she had to move forward with courage if she wanted to get back to Kansas. As she was finding these qualities in others, she was figuring out how to use them to help herself. She learned that sometimes what's on the outside can help us to build what we need on the inside. When I think about this process of dealing with fibro, it seems that fibro and fatigue have been my own personal tornado and I am certainly not where I used to be. It is taking all of my resources to manage it each day. But what's really great is that, just like Dorothy had the Tin Man, the Lion and the Scarecrow to show her what she needed, there are wonderful people in my life that continue to show me qualities I can embrace in finding my way back to me. Because that's the real journey - it can't matter whether I beat fibro or not - it only matters that it doesn't beat me.

On her journey to find her way home again Dorothy faced the good and the bad, hope and despair and she even had to deal with a few flying monkeys along the way. That's true for me, as well. It's been a down week, but yesterday I found myself shifting back to the positive and I found what I can be thankful for, amidst my challenges. Every time Dorothy met the good witch, she basked in love and every time the bad witch was around it made things more complicated and Dorothy was filled with fear. It's true for me that when I focus on love and possibility I am positive and hopeful. the negative just stops me in my tracks and I become unhappy and distressed. The yellow brick road led Dorothy to the wizard who was supposed to have all of the answers. Turns out he wasn't all that he was cracked up to be. When Dorothy pulled back the curtain she realized that he didn't have any more power than she did. There are no wizards to cure my fibro and I can't rely on anyone else to make me well. It's all up to me. Sure, there are experts, but I am the one that has to do the work.

In the end, Dorothy figured out that she had already had everything she needed inside of her to get back home again although it certainly helped  to have those ruby slippers,. Those slippers represent all of the tools I have available to me, to get me as healthy as I can be. When I am clear about what I want and what I need to do, I stay better balanced and I feel better. When I make choices that bring me down, I have to accept the consequence of that. I have power and influence over my well being. I need to stay smart and use all of the information and resources available to me, I have to manage my stress and keep my heart open and connected and I need to draw upon my inner strength and courage that keeps me putting one foot in front of the other. The flying monkeys may attack every now and then with a migraine or a day of fatigue and misery, but I can manage that by taking care of myself and planning on a better tomorrow. If Dorothy can find her way home, I can too.