Day 29 - Happily Staying in the Loop

The way I socialize has gone through some changes since fibro, with its chronic fatigue, came and plopped itself in the middle of my life. In some ways the changes are okay, but there are people that I miss that have fallen off along the way. I just didn't have the energy I used to have to devote to friendships and those friendships just couldn't bear the demands of thriving in the context of my unpredictable condition. My best friends have never lived close to me so I have always spent lots of time on the phone and that hasn't changed. I am so thankful for those friendships and feel grateful that I can still manage those kind of relationships. You don't have to be in the same room with a friend to have a fun-filled or rich conversation.

I've changed my expectations when I'm entertaining at home. I keep menus simple and when guests ask if they can bring anything I say, "yes". If we are getting together on the spur of the moment we order in pizza or get some kind of take-out to keep preparation simple and clean up easy. It's all about sharing company and not impressing folks with my culinary skills. I look forward to get-togethers at home and spending time with family and friends. That time has become very precious because it happens less frequently than it used to, and having loved ones visit at home will always be special.

I learned from my daughter that coffee shops are a wonderful place to have get-togethers, whether it's just one friend or a small group. A group of my college friends gets together over coffee - it's no stress for any of us, the coffee shop is centrally located and no one is responsible for clean-up. Getting together with friends and going out to dinner is just too much for me some days. But, getting together at a local coffee shop for a chat and a cuppa coffee is perfect. It's a rare day that I can't muster up the energy for that kind of a visit and I come away feeling connected and energized. Plus, I can show up in my jeans and a tee shirt and feel perfectly dressed for the occasion.

On days when I'm not up for a chat, it's great to instant message or text to stay in touch. My computer has become a huge part of my plan to stay in touch with my buddies. It's been a gradual but excellent change in how I check in with family, friends and colleagues. Participating in social networking sites is a fun way for me to interact with old friends and to discover new friends with common interests. Couch days are a lot more interesting with my laptop perched next to me and a couple of different kinds of conversations going. The fibro site I've connected with has been a rich source of conversation, camaraderie and connection. I'm a social person who loves to know what's going on with the people I care about - this social network stuff is just what the doctor ordered in keeping me in the loop and sharing what's going on with me.